Let’s be real. There’s so much information we are confronted with on a daily basis, it’s a wonder we can absorb even the infinitesimal amounts we do, without losing our minds. It’s even worse if you are a student. But think about it. From the time that we wake up, we are bombarded with thoughts, facts, questions, demands, statements, exclamations, commercials, hypotheses, fantasies . . . and all of that gets sorted through the amazing filter of our brains.
Al-Alon’s slogan, “Listen and Learn,” reminds us that if we have the self-discipline to be quiet and pay attention to others’ words, we can learn a tremendous amount about ourselves and our world. –How Al-Anon Works for Families and Friends of Alcoholics, p. 99
I don’t believe in coincidence anymore. When something happens to me that just seems to click for me, like it was supposed to happen, I call it a “God thing.”
A God thing happened for me Wednesday night when I went to a meeting and listened to the person opening the meeting as she read about detachment (Please do click on this – I don’t normally tell my gentle readers what to do, but this is pure gold. Read it.).
As I’ve been praying for help in getting off the train (no, I’m not all the way off, for I still carry this cloak of despair), I listened intently. I listened to everyone talk around the circle before I shared. There was laughter, as there always is at these meetings, and there was plenty of wisdom.
On my way out the door, the woman who had opened the meeting stopped me. She wanted to share a personal story with me. She knew about that train, she said. Her therapist had told her it’s normal to feel some grief after you have detached and pulled away from a loved one who is bent on self-destruction. It’s like, yes there is quiet and there is peace and there is not the constant tugging on your sleeve to drive you here and drive you there . . .
But it is never easy to watch someone self-destruct. Anyone who tells you they have detached and it doesn’t bother them a lick that their loved one is dying or pickling themselves is lying.
What lightens it is getting involved in the living around me. A couple of hours ago I got back from auditions for solos and small group ensembles for the September production of our Senior Broadway musical. I’m a Tenor Alto. I was nervous but so excited to be trying something new in my life. We won’t know what parts or songs we will be singing until Monday.
Woot! Life can be very very good.
7 thoughts on “What I Learned About “Listen And Learn””
The best lesson that i have ever learned in this life is ….” listen listen , your time to speak will always come……”
Wow, that’s a great lesson, thanks for sharing!
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Thanks, Sherrie. Detachment can’t even happen without willingness and surrender! Thanks for the encouraging comment. 🙂
Detatchment is the greatest thing ever……well right after willingness and surrender, but all these things go together beautifully! Chris thanks for a wonderful post!
You are growing by leaps and bounds in your recovery! One wise woman told me that when you first begin this journey called recovery you are fragile as a soap bubble. Beautiful, shimmering, but easily burst. As you grow stronger, your bubble thickens, still beautiful and shimmering, but much, much harder to break. You are “off the train” but it is normal for you to grieve. Love you!
Wow, thanks Deb. I love that image. That’s just a gorgeous image, and now I’ll always have it in my mind. You’re right, I AM off the train. And it’s okay to grieve. Love you too, my dear!