Your Call Is Very Important To Us

pleaseholdcover James bumped right into Patsy’s head, who had been helping him with decorations, when the phone rang. He dropped the Happy New Year banner, so that it swung precariously from one taped edge.

“Patsy, it’s the phone.” He tripped over a blue balloon, caught his hand on the corner of his desk, and landed in the chair, which sent him spinning into the corner. The phone rang again.

“James, the phone!” Patsy rubbed her head where it had collided with James, and paced back and forth, her poodle skirt making quiet swishing noises with every move. Patsy refused to update her wardrobe to the 21st century.

James pulled his chair back toward his desk. The phone rang a third time. He sharpened his pencil and pulled a book open to a fresh, clean page, flattening it with his hand. The phone rang a fourth time. He wrote the date.

James punched the blinking line, the only blinking line on the phone, and picked up the receiver.

“You Matter Crisis Hotline. Can you hold please?” Before waiting for an answer, he put the caller on hold.

James returned to the book. He wrote the day next to the date, looked at his watch and noted the time, and also wrote that down. Then he returned to his call.

“Thank you for holding, and Happy New Year. This is the hotline where you always matter. How may I help you?”

“My girlfriend left me on New Year’s Eve. Said she was reassessing her life and I wasn’t in it. Oh, and my dog died. I don’t see any reason to go on.”

“Can I please have your name, so I know what to call you?” James adjusted his paisley tie and wrote down in his book the phrases “girlfriend left” and “dog died.”

“Fred. My name is Fred. And – And I feel so alone. Everything is meaningless. There’s no point in anything.”

“Well, Fred, things’ll look better in the morning, after a good night’s sleep. That’s what I always say.”

“I’m an insomniac.” Fred’s monotone voice did not deter James from his mission.

“It’s always darkest before the dawn, Fred.”

“What does that even mean?” came the reply over the phone, which now sounded a bit more annoyed than depressed.

“Well, I think it means things are never as bad as they seem, and we should always keep our chin up, buttercup.” James wrote in the book “insomniac, aggressive.”

“She took all my Bruce Springsteen records.” Fred sobbed.

“You were too too good for her, Fred. And there are plenty of other fish in the sea.”

“If I was so great she would have stuck with me. And I don’t want a fish, I want a girlfriend. Do you actually get crisis training?” Fred shouted.

“Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes we just have to look for the reason.” James flipped through the allowed response book and desperately searched for something more to say. He wrote down “girlfriend took Springsteen records.”

“I had the best dog in the world. Snickers. A yellow lab. He used to be able to get bottles of soda for me from the fridge. Do you know how amazing that is?” Fred’s sobs were bordering on hysteria.

“Fred, Fred, you know-you know can always get another dog, just like you can always get more Springsteen records.”

“Oh, oh, dogs are so replaceable, aren’t they?”

“You know, God never gives us more than we can handle, Fred.”

“What?! What the heck does that mean?”

The phone rang.

“Fred, I’m going to have to put you on hold. Your call is very important to us.”

James punched the next line. “You Matter Crisis Line. Can you hold please?”

THE END

620 words

My blog is participating in the Forward Motion Flash Friday Blog Group, a weekly flash fiction exercise (that I may or may not manage weekly!). Check out the other participating blogs for more flash.

Peace out.

 

Tagged as: , ,

Categorised in: Flash Friday Blog Group, Fun, writing

8 Responses »

  1. Very well done! You crammed a whole lot of statement in this little piece of flash fiction. Bravo!

    Like

  2. oh my gosh.. I can relate to this and while disturbing.. I chuckled in a couple spots.. I like how the crisis counselor used all the “standard one-liners”.. very well done…

    Like

  3. *snicker* I’m sure I wouldn’t find it nearly as amusing if it were happening to me.

    BTW, I love the new background!

    Like

Lay it on me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Philosopher, mom, sex-worker

Determined to attract my Personal Heaven

National Institute of Canine Experts

Our Passion and Profession is Dogs!

Old Village Yarn Shop -- A Great Place to Knit

42307 East Ann Arbor Rd, Plymouth, MI (734) 451-0580

The Bipolar Writer Mental Health Blog

A Collaborative Mental Health Blog

UlstermanBooks

Author DW Ulsterman

KINDLE WEBSTORE is Your #1 Source for Kindle eBooks from the Amazon Kindle Store!

Everything for your Kindle ebooks, readers, accessories at the lowest prices.

Let's Talk About Anxiety

The Truth, the Whole Truth, and Nothing but The Truth

Logical Quotes

Logical and Inspirational Quotes

For The Love Of Dee

Life. Art. Poetry.

Personal Excellence

Striving Toward a Fulfilling Life

Chalkboard

Mrs. Smith's 3rd Grade Class

Samina's Forum for police support

A great forum of promotion of friendship and co-operation between citizens and Police Officers. Come join us.

Erin's random thoughts

Just another WordPress.com weblog

Grace seeks sanctuary

scrawls from the edge ~

Hope of another world's Weblog

Just another WordPress.com weblog

%d bloggers like this: