Depression: It Isn’t “The Blues”

caution depression ahead I wish a sign like this truly existed, to prepare depression sufferers, so we could gather our troops, call our allies, pack our supplies, and trench in.

I’m bipolar. Unlike my sister, who swings toward the manic side of bipolar, I swing toward the depressive side. So I have less manic episodes, and more depression. These past few weeks I’ve been experiencing bipolar depression symptoms, although I saw my doctor last week, and he tells me my symptoms are likely related to a situation in my life and will most likely go away when that situation is resolved.

My mom is seriously sick. She’s 85 years old, and I’m so grateful that this is the first time in all of her 85 years that she’s ever been seriously ill, but it doesn’t make it any easier to watch her suffer.

Even though I know my meetings will help, because it’s the place where I can be myself and share about my fears and sadness, instead of going I isolate and the depression builds. In other words, I don’t take the advice I so freely give away.

The best part is a good friend who doesn’t say anything at all, but just listens to me vent. Doesn’t offer platitudes or counsel, just sits next to me. For them – I am beyond thankful. Because it’s not about having “the blues,” as you can see from the symptoms above.  It’s not uncommon, for I know I have many comrades-in-arms. But it’s not something I can just shake off, or I would have done so. Trust me. Peace out.depressed_silhouette

3 Comments

I’m sorry you are feeling depressed. Depression is real and it is not something you can “snap out of” but it is something you can give over to your Higher Power. Sitting at home an isolating is not the solution. As I’m sure you are aware, isolation only perpetuates the problem and feeling. Going to a meeting, even if you don’t want to, is exactly the thing that may help you see your depression for what it is. Remember, it is our own thinking that lead us to Al-Anon and if we isolate from meetings, it is our own thinking that will keep us out of meetings. Hope you feel better soon.

Like

Hope your doc is right about the mood lifting when the situation is resolved. And if you’ve said anything in FB and I haven’t commented, don’t be upset, I gave it up for Lent. Heard something from my daughter about a friend so went to lend my support and then found this blog post. I think if anyone asks me what I’m doing for my birthday in a few weeks, I’ll say “slamming the door on the last year.” I had some good things happen but it still wasn’t a good year emotionally. Hugs. ❤

Like

Wow.. thank you so much for posting this… I know I go thru this every once in a while and it lasts for 2-3 weeks and it makes me soooo sad and my family gets annoyed with me and the thought of suicide slightly enters my mind.. today in work I broke down sobbing and my BF asked me what was wrong when we were on the phone and I couldn’t tell him because I don’t know!!!!!

And I know what you mean about not wanting to go to a meeting… gah!!!

Thanks for so much for sharing where you are right now… although it is sad you are feeling this way, have faith that you will get thru it and you are not alone…. again, thanks for sharing your story here… You’ve helped so much. ❤

Darlene

Like

Lay it on me!

Name and email address are required. Your email address will not be published.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

You may use these HTML tags and attributes:

<a href="" title="" rel=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <pre> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong> 

%d bloggers like this: